Author Open Storythread
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For those of you unfamiliar with the concept,


Now with that out of the way, I'd like an open story-telling thread where we write stories and give one another writing advice.
Rules are covered in the link above.

I was unsure whether this belonged here or in original/fanfiction but I thought that because it could include any/all options and could include scenarios and conversations based on the stories, it was best suited here as a general category.
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Ngl most people are better off putting their original fictions in literature cause of how little traction the original fiction subsubforum threads get.

Well I've got three short stories that I've been storing forever. I wanna get into writing again in the future when I feel like I'm bored to death. Please tell me what you think, I'm working on improving the tension and character interactions in my story.

Little Robot
Unfeeling Elegy
The Doctor, the Halo, the Scythe

P.s. I'm planning to expand the second one so what you're seeing there is a sort of prologue. Also if you're bothered by in Little Robot that is because
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It's perfectly find to make readers feel uncomfortable or sad as it's part of good story telling. Alan Moore's Watchmen is a good example of a story that was designed to make people feel uncomfortable as it was written to go against he "invincible, indestructible" mindset around Superheroes and the Reagan Era. It's all in execution. @DANDAN_THE_DANDAN
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@Tamerlane Yeah I agree but I don't want to step too far or do it wrong to the point that people think I'm just incompetent at writing.
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@tamerlane @DANDAN_THE_DANDAN i'm down with this
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Yeah, I always enjoyed reading the various posts and stuff on places like /tg/ and I'd be interested in what people on like mangadex come up with as a stories. I'm not posting much in here right now because this is for short stories and I'm working on a bigger one for Original Fiction. This thread is meant for short stories that are either original or based off another work. @fagguette