1 Only Reason
Title ID:
45498
Alt name(s):
Author:
Artist:
Demographic:
Content:
Format:
Theme:
Rating:
  • 5.90
  • 2.05
  • 37
Pub. status:
Ongoing
Stats:
  • 9,081
  • 126
  • 32
Description:
This is the story of Elishé, an asexual succubus who deals with depression once she's disinherited for the deserting her own race.
Reading progress:
  • Volume 0/?
  • Chapter 0/?

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Cankles. That is all.
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@Kosera IIRC, it's "Chekhov's gun".
Last edited 3 mo ago by leechXlurk.
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what is the reason?
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This is more of a review rant than anything else but i feel i have some things i can't stop myself from commenting on.

There is a golden rule to story telling, i cant remember who said it (some russian i think), but it goes something like this: "if there is a rifle on a table in the first chapter, it has to be fired by the second or third, or it shouldn't have been there on the table in the first place"

Although the premiss of an asexual succubus promptly being thrown down to earth for being asexual is pretty funny, i'm left wondering why the MC hasn't just killed herself already, its all so miserable and terrible yet she keeps on keeping on for no reason at all, give her some meaning, give her a goal, give her a reason to progress and grow as a person until the day she might be able to face her family again. That would make for something interesting to read. Make a point, stories are not something for just about anyone to just tinker with and then throw out there for anyone to see. Stories are powerful tools used for telling about things YOU want to tell about.

So stop taking the story (or yourself for that matter) so seriously, give the characters some motivation and an arc to follow (think of the rifle on the table) and don't add any more of them than is needed, for god's sake.

And also the art is really rough at best, but i'm very impressed by the amount being drawn. I can tell there is considerable work being put in. If you, the person drawing all this is stubborn enough to do all that has already been done without loosing confidence, there shouldn't be anything stopping you from improving, so long you actually try to improve.
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Hey, this is cool.